2014 - A Year of Gratitude

My Dear Family,

"Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough." Oprah couldn't have said it any better. It seems we live in a day and age where there's never enough for us to truly be happy. If only we had more, life would be grand. We end up living life in the future while ruminating about the past, and we don't concentrate on the here and now. Since there is no way to change the past, and no way to ever live in the future, a lot of our today's are wasted. And that is a shame.

As I sang the fist line of the second verse of our closing hymn in church today, tears began to flow and I felt the Lord had found way into my heart. "More gratitude give me, More trust in the Lord," . . . I couldn't sing another word. My heart was softened and my mind was opened and over the course of the rest of the hymn, I felt my life turn in a new direction.

For more years than I can count, I have concentrated on enough. When I'm thin enough, when there is enough money, when I have enough time, when I'm smart enough, the list goes on and on and on. I envy others "with their lands and gold" and loathe my own situation. I see everything I don't have or can't do and rarely look at what I do have and what I can do. Somewhere I lost my gratitude, and at the same time, I stopped trusting in the Lord. Oh, I remember the prescribed way to pray and always say I'm thankful for this or that, but then I begin the long list of wishes, desires and demands. Instead of feeling like I have communed with heaven when I get up off my knees, I feel little at all. 

Could gratitude be the key to feeling closer to Heavenly Father? And could trust in the Lord be the key to gratitude? I'm not exactly sure, but I'm going to experiment this year with that concept. 

I declare the year 2014 The Year of Gratitude and Trust in the Lord. 

I will spend time each day looking around for those things with which I have been blessed and I will write them down and then take them to the Lord in prayer. I will trust that He knows what I need in order to fulfill the mission he sent me here to perform. I will trust that he knows and loves each of my children, parents, brothers, sisters, relatives and friends more than I can fully understand, and he knows what each of them needs. I will trust Him to guide and direct me in my relationships so they can grow and be strenghthened.

"And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more" (D&C 78:19). " . . . he who receiveth all things with thankfulness . . . " All things. All things! Even trials and tribulations? Maybe so. That may sound contradictory, but I think of it like this: I wouldn't want to be widowed again, but I wouldn't trade all I have learned since that horrible night. Through great adversity, I grew and learned and found my testimony. So this year I will be grateful for all things, no matter how difficult they may be. 

And what do I hope to gain? The feeling of enough so that I can be content with what I have here and now. Trust in the Lord that He can and will do all He has promised. Gratitude for family, friends, work, home, body and mind, talents, gifts and learning. I hope by the end of 2014 I feel my life is full, and although not yet perfected, perfect for me.

I challenge each of you to take this year to strive to live a life of gratefulness as you learn to trust in the Lord. He loves us all and I believe He rejoices when we find the good and the blessings in our lives. It is my prayer that each of us will face the challenges of 2014 with gratitude in our hearts for each day we are allowed to awaken and breathe the breath of a new day. "Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more." And may I add that it will be enough.

Love,

Mom   

That's me on the right with the Board of Regents and President Richards on the back row in the middle. It was a pretty crazy evening, one I will never forget!

Graduation

I graduated with my Associate's degree in Secondary Education on May 18, 2009. I was chosen to be the first-ever student speaker at the commencement ceremony in the thirty-seven year history of the College of Southern Nevada. My family was there with the exception of one son and daughter-in-law who were in Iowa and one son who is in Mexico serving an LDS mission. It was wonderful to have my parents there, and afterward they hugged the stuffin' out of me. Here is my speech:

Believe You Can
CSN Commencement Speech, May, 2009
by Charlene J. Paul

Thank-you President Richards. Good evening Ann Johnson, April Krell, Board of Regents, Faculty and Staff. I appreciate all you have done for my fellow graduates and for me. With budget problems looming over your heads, you have never forgotten the students whom you serve. With your continued diligence and support, CSN will forge ahead in strength, serving students not only from our Southern Nevada communities, but from communities all over the nation and in some instances, the world. So once again, thank you.

Greetings Graduates, Families and friends. What a wonderful day! When I started college thirty-three years ago, I never dreamed that I would be fifty-one years old on the day I graduated! But fifty-one I am, and I am grateful to be here with all of you, and honored for the opportunity I have of speaking to you for a few minutes.

The poet, Edgar Guest said,

“Can’t is the worst word that’s written or spoken;
Doing more harm here than slander and lies;
On it is many a strong spirit broken,
And with it many a good purpose dies.
It springs from the lips of the thoughtless each morning
And robs us of courage we need through the day:
It rings in our ears like a timely sent warning
And laughs when we falter and fall by the way.”

“Can’t is the father of feeble endeavor,
The parent of terror and halfhearted work;
It weakens the efforts of artisans clever,
And makes of the toiler an indolent shirk.
It poisons the soul of the man with a vision,
It stifles in infancy many a plan;
It greets honest toiling with open derision
And mocks at the hopes and the dreams of a man.”

I was raised in Las Vegas by parents who believed I could do anything. They rarely let me out of a task because I said, “I can’t.” In fact, they believed saying “I can’t” was the same as
saying “I won’t” or “I quit.” Often when I would declare that I couldn’t accomplish the task at hand, the reply was that the problem didn’t lie with my abilities, the problem was my attitude.

Twenty-three years ago, I was widowed and left with two small boys to raise. It was a daunting task and I wasn’t sure how I would do it. Saying “I can’t”, “I won’t”, or “I quit” wasn’t an option because I had two little boys who needed me and who deserved a mom who wouldn’t give up and quit because life got hard.


Two years later, I was blessed to find a wonderful man who loved me and wanted to help me raise my two sons. We were married and became the parents of two more sons and two daughters. My husband and I have tried to instill in them the idea that they could do anything. We have been relentless as we have told them time and again that saying “I can’t”, “I won’t”, or “I quit” isn’t an option. They would get so angry at times because they were certain we were ruining their lives, and they were certain we didn’t know just how hard things were. It has been an interesting and sometimes difficult journey as I have watched them grow, learn, and experience life.

When I returned to college in the fall of 2007, I wasn’t sure I could hack it. I was afraid that my brain had somehow turned to mush from years of no schooling. I was afraid I wouldn’t fit in with classmates who were much younger than I. I was afraid, plainly and simply, afraid. And secretly I decided that if it got too hard, I would quit. But please don’t tell my kids.

You know what? It was hard. On one occasion, I brought home a quiz that had a big, fat, red C at the top of the page. I didn’t feel too badly about it, though, because, after all, it had been several decades since I had gone to school. But my then fourteen-year-old daughter saw it, picked it up, waived it at me and said, “Mom, you know a C is unacceptable in this house!” In her voice, I heard my own words coming back at me, telling me that I had better shape up and get to work. So I continued on and guess what? I could. I did. And I will continue.

But what about today? And what about you? That is the real world out there, and there is so much around you that is negative. The economy isn’t good. The housing market is bad. The national debt is out of control. Families are falling apart. Politicians and leaders can’t be trusted. The outlook is bleak.

So what is to be done? Maybe nothing can be done. Maybe it’s time to sit this one out. Maybe it’s time to throw in the towel. Maybe it’s time to say you can’t do it. Maybe it’s time to quit.

Don’t you believe it! You are prepared. This is your day. You have the know-how and the tenacity. You are being handed an enormous challenge - to fix what generations before have messed up. You are going to be expected to do things that no one has yet figured out how to do. You are going to be expected to invent things that haven’t yet been thought of. You are going to be expected to give birth to ideas that will change the course of history. You are going to be expected to do the impossible. Will you be able to do it?

So many young people are giving in to the cynicism of my generation. So many young people are beginning to believe that things can only get worse. So many young people are filled with despair and discouragement. If you listen to the news or popular opinion, you will hear plenty of complainers, pessimists, prophets-of-doom, and party-poopers. Don’t you become one of them! Have a dream. Get to work. Never give up. You will find the answers. You will solve
the problems. You will make a difference. If you doubt that, stand back, take a deep breath, and then believe that you can.


I wish you could stand here and feel what I feel - an energy in the air that almost takes my breath away. I wish each one of you could stand at this microphone and look out and see
what I see - eyes full of eagerness and curiosity, faces set with determination and wonder. In your faces I see answers to questions that are beyond my capability to answer. I see bookkeepers, builders, and casino managers. I see dental hygienists, diesel mechanics, and engineers. I see medical assistants, musicians, and nurses. I see prospective firefighters, police officers and teachers. In short, I see the future.

I believe, as Edgar Guest said:

“You’re well equipped for what fight you choose;
You have arms and legs and a brain to use.
And the man who has risen, great deeds to do
Began his life with no more than you.
So figure it out for yourself, my lad,
You were born with all that the great have had.
With your equipment they all began,
Get hold of yourself and say, ‘I can.’”